"i dont know about you, but im feeling 22 officer so i dont think these underage drinking charges should really apply to me"
thinking about my future gives me a headache.
I’m not drunk I’m chillin
Does Canada even have a president or is it just whichever moose has the strongest antlers
why cant i cry money instead of tears
repeat after me friends:
- vaginas are self-cleaning
- there is no such thing as a dirty vagina
- unless you have an infection
- in which case your vagina still isn’t dirty but you should really go see a doctor
- but yeah
- vaginas aren’t “clean” or “dirty” they’re self-cleaning acidic muscular tracts
- so fuck off
if you’re ever feeling down about ur parents doing a shit job,
just know my mum and dad thought my birthday was the 14th of August for the first 6 years of my life, and literally my entire family celebrated it on that day. It wasn’t until they enrolled me at school they checked my birth certificate again,
my birthday is on the 11th.
I’m sorry I laughed.
do people in nudist colonies send nudes or do they just call them selfies
I regret nearly everything I did between the ages of birth and however old I was yesterday.
mermaids don’t have thigh gaps but they can still lure men to their deaths